Lawsuit

I just wanted everyone to know that I have initiated a class action lawsuit against the State of Texas. I wanted you to hear it from me before you read about it in the paper.

In summary, I bought a Lotto ticket on the drive to work weeks ago. After reviewing my picks last night I noticed that I (in a honest mistake) picked the wrong numbers. What I actually meant to pick were the correct numbers!

Accordingly, I should be awarded the 40 million dollar lotto prize that was issued that week. I'm certain others made the same dreadful mistake. I'm also reviewing previously unclaimed winning tickets because I also have the right to claim them as mine.

I have also filed another lawsuit against the State of Texas. After thinking about my SAT scores, I feel there is a chance that I may have punched the wrong answers on several questions, or selected two answers if I wasn't certain, when I took the exam 17 years ago. If I had been treated fairly, I might have grown up to be a Bill Gates, or, heaven forbid, even a Bill Clinton. The questions were (at times) very misleading and the exam score card was quite confusing.

Thanks for your understanding on this serious matter. And please feel free to join in on the lawsuit.

Warm regards,
GWB