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- Alabama:
- Yes, We Have Electricity
- Alaska:
- 11,623 Eskimos Can't Be Wrong!
- Arizona:
- But It's a Dry Heat
- Arkansas:
- Litterasy Ain't Everthing
- California:
- By 30, Our Women Have More Plastic Than Your Honda
- Colorado:
- If You Don't Ski, Don't Bother
- Connecticut:
- Like Massachusetts, Only The Kennedys Don't Own It Yet
- Delaware:
- We Really Do Like The Chemicals In Our Water
- Florida:
- Ask Us About Our Grandkids
- Georgia:
- We Put The 'Fun' In Fundamentalist Extremism
- Hawaii:
- Haka Tiki Mou Sha'ami Leeki Toru
(Death To Mainland Scum, But Leave Your Money)
- Idaho:
- More Than Just Potatoes... Well Okay, We're Not, But The Potatoes Sure Are Real Good
- Illinois:
- Please Don't Pronounce the 'S'
- Indiana:
- 2 Billion Years Tidal Wave Free
- Iowa:
- We Do Amazing Things With Corn
- Kansas:
- First Of The Rectangle States
- Kentucky:
- Five Million People; Fifteen Last Names
- Louisiana:
- We're Not ALL Drunk Cajun Wackos, But That's Our Tourism Campaign
- Maine:
- We're Really Cold, But We Have Cheap Lobster
- Maryland:
- If You Can Dream It, We Can Tax It
- Massachusetts:
- Our Taxes Are Lower Than Sweden's (For Most Tax Brackets)
- Michigan:
- First Line Of Defense From The Canadians
- Minnesota:
- 10,000 Lakes And 10,000,000,000 Mosquitoes
- Mississippi:
- Come Feel Better About Your Own State
- Missouri:
- Your Federal Flood Relief Tax Dollars At Work
- Montana:
- Land Of The Big Sky, The Unabomber, Right-Wing Crazies, & Very Little Else
- Nebraska:
- Ask About Our State Motto Contest
- Nevada:
- Whores and Poker!
- New Hampshire:
- Spend Your Money, Then Go Away And Leave Us Alone
- New Jersey:
- You Want A ##$%##! Motto? I Got Yer ##$%##! Motto Right Here!
- New Mexico:
- Lizards Make Excellent Pets
- New York:
- You Have The Right To Remain Silent, You Have The Right To An Attorney...
- North Carolina:
- Tobacco Is A Vegetable
- North Dakota:
- We Really Are One Of The 50 States!
- Ohio:
- At Least We're Not Michigan
- Oklahoma:
- Like The Play, Only No Singing
- Oregon:
- Spotted Owl... It's What's For Dinner
- Pennsylvania:
- Cook With Coal
- Rhode Island:
- We're Not REALLY An Island
- South Carolina:
- Remember The Civil War? Well, We Didn't Actually Surrender
- South Dakota:
- Closer Than North Dakota
- Tennessee:
- The Educashun State
- Texas:
- Si' Hablo Ing'les (Yes, I Speak English)
- Utah:
- Our Jesus Is Better Than Your Jesus
- Vermont:
- Ayuh!
- Virginia:
- Who Says Government Stiffs And Slackjaw Yokels Don't Mix?
- Washington:
- Help! We're Overrun By Nerds And Slackers!
- Washington, D.C.:
- Wanna Be Mayor?
- West Virginia:
- One Big Happy Family...Really!
- Wisconsin:
- Come Cut The Cheese
- Wyoming:
- Where Men Are Men...And The Sheep Are Scared
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