
I am sick and tired of hearing about how dumb people are in the South.
I challenge any socalled smart Yankee to take this exam:
 Calculate the smallest limb diameter on a persimmon tree that will support a 10pound possum.
 Which of these cars will rust out the quickest when placed on blocks in your front yard?
(a) '65 Ford Fairlane,
(b) '69 Chevrolet Chevelle, or
(c) '64 Pontiac GTO.
 If your uncle builds a still which operates at a capacity of 20 gallons of shine produced per hour, how many car radiators are required to condense the product?
 A woodcutter has a chainsaw which operates at 2700 RPM. The density of the pine trees in the plot to be harvested is 470 per acre. The plot is 2.3 acres in size. The average tree diameter is 14 inches. How many Budwiesers will be drunk before the trees are cut down?
 If every old refrigerator in the state vented a charge of R12 simultaneously, what would be the percentage decrease in the ozone layer?
 A front porch is constructed of 2x8 pine on 24inch centers with a field rock foundation. The span is 8 feet and the porch length is 16 feet. The porch floor is 1inch rough sawn pine. When the porch collapses, how many hound dogs will be killed?
 A man owns a Tennessee house and 3.7 acres of land in a hollow with an average slope of 15%. The man has five children. Can each of his grown children place a mobile home on the man's land and still have enough property for their electric appliances to sit out front?
 A 2ton truck is overloaded and proceeding 900 yards down a steep slope on a secondary road at 45 MPH. The brakes fail. Given average traffic conditions on secondary roads, what is the probability that it will strike a vehicle with a muffler?
 A coalmine operates a NFPA Class 1, Division 2 Hazardous Area. The mine employs 120 miners per shift. A gas warning is issued at the beginning of the 3rd shift. How many cartons of unfiltered Camels will be smoked during the shift?
 At a reduction in the gene pool variability rate of 7.5% per generation, how long will it take a town which has been bypassed by the Interstate to breed a countrywestern singer?

