Two old ladies were outside their nursing home having a smoke (that's the only place they are allowed to smoke at the nursing home), when it starts to rain. One of the ladies pulls out a condom, cuts off the end and puts it over her cigarette, and continues smoking.

Lady 2: "What's that?"
Lady 1: "A condom."
Lady 2: "Where'd you get it?"
Lady 1: "You can get them at any drugstore."

The next day, Lady 2 hobbles herself into the local drugstore and announces to the pharmacist that she wants a package of condoms. The pharmacist is obviously puzzled by this request, after all, this lady is in her 80's, but politely asks what brand she prefers.

"Doesn't matter," she responds, "as long as it fits a Camel".